I honestly had the BEST of intentions to post an entry on this blog EVERY day for eight consecutive days.  I did. I really did!

So I did TWO consecutive days of posting before breaking my eight day commitment.  But dear reader, please do not assume that I overate insanely and/or avoided exercise just because I didn’t post like I said I would.  All I can say is that sometimes LIFE and CRISES interfere with the best of my intentions and plans.  Even when they do, that is NO excuse for relapse into active addiction.

Actually, at least one of the crises that popped up a few weeks ago managed to remind me of a couple of important truths that I need to remember…truths that can even (eventually) strengthen my commitment to my recovery process. Specific lessons and reminders from the crises included…

1)  I have a right (even an obligation) to THINK BEFORE making a commitment (like making a commitment to write an online journal entry EVERY day for EIGHT consecutive days) when I know (had I thought things through)  that I was coming up on some of the busiest days of the month in terms of my “day job”! The same days each month are my busiest. So WHY do I OVERcommit myself, just to NOT be able to follow through? What is my PAYOFF for this ? Am I that “addicted” to the shame and guilt that I KNOW I ALWAYS get when I don’t follow through on my commitments?

2)  I have a right to NOT respond to  e-mail messages that start out being full of personal attacks and histrionic comments.

3)  I have a right to allow another person to be mad at me, rather than trying to “fix” their feelings or attempt to “make them happy”.

4)  I have a right to delay responding to hysterical individuals until they regain their composure and back off from being on the “attack mode”.  And if they don’t calm down?  Not my issue (especially if I’ve made amends in those cases where it appears to me that it is appropriate for me to make amends).

In any case, rather than re-starting my 8 Day Revival series of posts what I’m hereby giving myself permission is just go ahead and DUMP about some issues that are bothering me. If it takes me eight days of dumping, so be it.  More or less than eight days is OK too.

I’m even gonna’ give myself permission to NOT spend hours searching for or creating a nice picture or some other nifty graphic to go with each of my journal entries!  I can go back and find and/or add them later –If I choose to.  Getting out the words ought to be my first priority.  Dressing up the words visually?  Not so important.

Off the top of my head, I’d like to DUMP about the following topics over the course of the next (insert # here) days…

1)  Problems I’ve had with the otherwise-wonderful Weight Watchers food plan.

2)  My fears about posting my food intake and other information from my Recovery Journal Sheet on this blog.

3)  My difficulties dealing with “ANGRY people”.

4)  My difficulty being able to HAVE FUN in the process of working on my recovery.

5)  Coping with the pain of rejection.

I think this list of five things to DUMP about is plenty.  😀